# Stiffy Makane: Apocolocyntosis — 209 of 235

## One of the Bruces and Drunken Bastard

Release 1

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Part Five - "Deep Cellars"

Wine Cellar is a room. It is east of the stout door and west of Dim Alcove. "The wine cellar is little more than a dark grotto. A stout door [if the stout door is open]opens to the[otherwise]bars the way[end if] west, and a dank natural passage descends to the east. Racks of wine line the walls."

Instead of going down in Wine Cellar, try going east. Instead of going up in Wine Cellar, try going west.

Scenery_cheap_wine is scenery in the Wine Cellar. The printed name is "racks of wine". The description is "There are many bottles of wine here; they are indistinguishable to you." Does the player mean doing something with the scenery_cheap_wine: it is unlikely. Instead of tasting the scenery_cheap_wine, say "It would be rude to simply raid your host's cellar." Instead of smelling the scenery_cheap_wine, say "It smells like a dusty bottle." Understand "wine", "bottle", "red", "bottles", "cheap", "dusty", "rack", and "racks" as the scenery_cheap_wine. It is ambiguously plural.

Sanity-check drinking the scenery_cheap_wine:

Follow the taking_cheap_wine rule;

instead try eating the cheap_wine.

Sanity-check eating the scenery_cheap_wine:

Follow the taking_cheap_wine rule;

instead try eating the cheap_wine.

Instead of taking the scenery_cheap_wine:

Follow the taking_cheap_wine rule.

This is the taking_cheap_wine rule:

if the cheap_wine is held by the player, instead say "You already have a bottle. Don't be greedy.";

remove the cheap_wine from play;

move the cheap_wine to the player;

say "You take a bottle of wine at random from the rack."

Some cheap_wine is a thing. It is ambiguously plural. The printed name is "random bottle of wine". The description of the cheap_wine is "This is a bottle of wine. You really can't say much more about it." Some cheap_wine can be openable. It is openable. Some cheap_wine can be edible. It is edible. Some cheap_wine can be drinkable. It is drinkable. Instead of eating the cheap_wine, say "You feel that drinking your way through your host's cellar uninvited would be rude." Instead of tasting the cheap_wine, try eating the cheap_wine. Instead of drinking the cheap_wine, try eating the cheap_wine. Instead of opening the cheap_wine, try eating the cheap_wine. Instead of smelling the cheap_wine, say "It smells like a dusty bottle, since it is closed." Understand "wine", "random", "bottle", "bottles", "cheap", "red", "bottle of wine", "bottles of wine", and "plonk" as cheap_wine. Does the player mean doing something with the cheap_wine: it is likely.

Dim Alcove is a room. It is east of Wine Cellar. Instead of going up in Dim Alcove, try going west. The description is "Only a tiny bit of light dribbles in from the wine cellar above and to the west. Thick curtains of moonmilk drape the walls and the muddy limestone floor."

Some moonmilk is scenery in Dim Alcove. Some moonmilk can be edible. It is edible. Some moonmilk can be drinkable. It is drinkable. Instead of drinking the moonmilk, try eating the moonmilk. Understand "moon", "wall", "walls", "milk", "curtain", "flow", "drapery", "cellar", "alcove", "dim", "shadowy", "dark", "darkness", "curtains", "drape", "drapes", and "moon-milk" as moonmilk. The description is "Moonmilk is a calcite deposit, with the appearance and consistency of cottage cheese, often found in caves. Although it looks like cottage cheese, it[if moonmilk is warned_about] tastes[otherwise]'s said to taste[end if] considerably worse[49 as a footnote]. Unlike cottage cheese, it[if some potatos are warned_about]grants[otherwise]'s supposed to grant[end if] the power to understand animals[apostrophe] speech if you eat it. The moonmilk in here drapes the walls and covers the floor, leaving you to wonder what might be hidden under its strange bulges." Instead of doing anything other than examining, eating, drinking, or searching with the moonmilk, say "That wouldn't be very productive, although it might be messy." Instead of looking under the moonmilk, try searching the moonmilk.

Sanity-check eating moonmilk:

if moonmilk is not warned_about

begin;

say "You scoop up a little moonmilk with your finger, and taste it. It's almost exactly like eating chalk. Yuck.";

now moonmilk is warned_about;

otherwise;

say "Yuck. No thank you. Once was enough.";

end if;

stop the action.

Before searching moonmilk for the first time:

say "You find an ancient and niter-encrusted bottle well-hidden behind a flow of moonmilk.";

move the ancient bottle to the location;

stop the action.

The rough_limestone_floor is a floor_scenery in the Dim Alcove. The description is "Muddy limestone forms the floor of the alcove." The printed name is "limestone". Understand "limestone", "floor", "rough", "mud", "cellar", "muddy", and "alcove" as the rough_limestone_floor. Does the player mean doing something with the rough_limestone_floor: it is unlikely. Instead of searching the rough_limestone_floor, try searching the moonmilk.

The ancient bottle is a chef-fetch-quest-item. Understand "wine", "bottle", "ancient", "red", "bottle of wine", "nitre", "niter", "rime", "rimed", "crust", "encrusted", "crusty", and "antique" as the ancient bottle. "An ancient bottle of wine, rimed with niter, is barely visible behind a drapery of moonmilk." The description is "This is an antique bottle of wine, encrusted with niter." The ancient bottle can be openable. It is openable. The ancient bottle can be edible. It is edible. The ancient bottle can be drinkable. It is drinkable. Instead of eating the ancient bottle, say "You are pretty sure you should just present this to the chef instead." Instead of opening the ancient bottle, try eating the ancient bottle. Instead of drinking the ancient bottle, try eating the ancient bottle. Does the player mean doing something with the ancient bottle: it is very likely.