# Stiffy Makane: Apocolocyntosis — 217 of 235

## One of the Bruces and Drunken Bastard

Release 1

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Chapter One - "Checks and Balances"

Every turn during Good Heavens:

if the location is the Summit and the mysterious goddess is in the location and the mysterious goddess is unaroused

begin;

decrease the trivia-clock of the mysterious goddess by 1;

if the trivia-clock of the mysterious goddess is 0

begin;

say "'Alas, time is up,' sighs the goddess. 'What a pity. Oh well, better luck next time.' She kisses you on the cheek and vanishes with a small thunderclap.";

remove the mysterious goddess from play;

otherwise;

if the trivia-clock of the mysterious goddess < 5

begin;

say "[The mysterious goddess] considers you. 'You have [trivia-clock of the mysterious goddess in words] minute[if the trivia-clock of the mysterious goddess > 1]s[end if] left to pray to me by name,' she notes. [run paragraph on]";

choose a random row from the Table of Trivial Hints;

let T be the hint entry;

say "[T].";

blank out the whole row;

end if;

end if;

end if;

if the location is the Summit and the mysterious goddess is in the location and the mysterious goddess is proper-named

begin;

choose a row with a castmember of "Rosario Dawson" in the Table of Real Cast Members;

now the character entry is "Trivia";

end if.

Table of Trivial Hints

hint
"'If you can guess my name, the whole trifecta is on the menu,' she smiles, briefly touching her fingertips to her lips, her pelvis, and her buttocks"
"'Pursuing me was quite the pastime, once upon a time,' she sighs wistfully"
"'There are those who claim I've become awfully liberal in the arts of seduction, but they're a bit less than half right,' she murmurs"
"'Did you know that the highest peak of Olympus, Mytikas, on which we now stand, is 2917 meters above sea level?' the goddess asks, irrelevantly"
"'Turn-ons: long walks on the beach, fast horses, grammar, rhetoric, and logic,' she points out, staring at you hungrily"

This is the do-you-feel-lucky-punk rule:

if the score is less than possible-points-by-summit, rule succeeds;

if the has-prayed-to-slot is "wrong", rule succeeds;

[Trivia will never show up if the player has not already maxed out his conquests, or if he's prayed to the incorrect deity]

move the mysterious goddess to the location;

really have the parser notice the mysterious goddess;

say "As you approach the bridge, there's a sudden 'bamf' noise, and standing before you is a beautiful dark-skinned woman. 'Hello, there, Stiffy,' she says. 'I[apostrophe]m the goddess of the Last Lousy Point, among other things. You have impressed me with your tally of conquests so far, [run paragraph on]";

now the mysterious goddess is warned_about;

choose a row with a character of "The mysterious goddess" in the Table of Real Cast Members;

now the met entry is true;

if the has-prayed-to-slot is "(null)"

begin;

say "and now all I require of you is that you pray to me by name. If you do me that one trifling, inconsequential task,' she says, twirling her raven locks with her fingers, 'then I would be more than happy to bestow upon you the aforementioned Last Lousy Point. I'll give you [trivia-clock of the mysterious goddess in words] minutes to figure it out.'";

increase the trivia-clock of the mysterious goddess by 1;

otherwise;

say "and with your masterful selection of [has-prayed-to-slot] as the addressee of your prayer. I am Trivia, goddess of the Three Ways, slightly fewer than half of the liberal arts, esoteric knowledge, sixty-degree circular wedges, text adventurers, and, as I mentioned, the Last Lousy Point. Would you like to score it? It's yours for the taking.'";

now the mysterious goddess is proper-named;

now the mysterious goddess is horny;

now the printed name of the mysterious goddess is "Trivia";

choose a row with a castmember of "Rosario Dawson" in the Table of Real Cast Members;

now the character entry is "Trivia";

end if;

rule fails.